fuzzy

Today was a long day. I got up at 4:30 am to drive, got in to my hotel around 6:20 and they gave me a room, which was nice. I signed up for the shuttle. Then I waited all day. I got there signed in and waited. I got prepped and waited for them to put drops in my eyes. Then I took off all my jewelry (except for my ring, Mina) and waiting int eh waiting room with a hair net on. They called us in tot he surgery room in groups of 4 and covered us blankets and told us to close our eyes. Then they prepped me some more and laid me out on the table. I think they were supposed to tell me what was going to happen, but whomever's job that was forgot, so like all of a sudden the team showed up held my head down, held my eyes open told me NOT TO MOVE AT ALL. I totally freaked out at the abruptness, but I didn't want to move or mess up the surgery. So by the time the guy who got me up and taped my eyes shut, moved me I was totally spazing out and crying . But everyone was crying so it wasn't that big of a deal lol. The prep guy took me back over for the second part and he said, "Are you ok?" He was very kind, it was very comforting. I said,"Yeah, but can you make sure to tell me what you are going to do before you do it?" He said,"Your consultant didn't tell you!?!?!" I said,"NO." He said," Lay down, I'll explain the next part of the surgery." And he did, and I was slightly less freaked out. I just get really nervous when I feel even a little helpless. It is something I react to very strongly, especially when the tech told me in a loud firm voice to hold still I panicked a little. It's something I do, a tic or nervous habit. I had a very small moment when I really wished Adam was there to hold my hand. :( Oh well, I am here, it's done. I am very excited, I think my vision will end up basically being perfect.

Anyways, I see clearly far way now, but my whole vision is just foggy like when your eyes are really tired over you have been staring at a computer screen to long. I think it will clear up tomorrow or the next day. I have medicated contact lenses that are coming out tomorrow.

The really funny thing is when I got up, they had taped my eyes shut, and were holding my hands to lead me forward. It was really strange to have another man hold my hands. I have held my little sisters' hands, but they are always smaller then me, and I don't hold my Dad's hand any more so to have a person take me by the hands was a really strange feeling, and I know I only notice because its been since July since I have held Adam's hand.

More tomorrow!