I have...

......killed 4 huge spiders. 4! This means that I keep thinking there is something crawling on me and nothing is there. Sigh. I got bit by a spider about a month ago and it was really gross for about 5 days. It took a long time to totally heal.

......taken your advice and cleaned my house, it feels much better. It's not totally clean, but it is way nicer. I took all the junk out of my room and put it in my living room! Yeay for the living room.

...... assembled a $20 walmart grill. It's basically a camp grill. I am sure it will work poorly when I try to make it work.

......done two loads of laundry, a load of dishes, hand washed 90% of the hand wash dishes, put away all my winter clothes, and swept the kitchen floor.

...... done some interpretive writing and drawing about why I am so out of it, and why I am so stressed out and anxious. It helped put things into perspective, but didn't really solve the feelings, just rationalized them. Meh.

...... read all my blog-roll blogs and commented where I felt like I had something useful or relevant to say.

...... eaten everything in the house. First I started out eating healthy, then I ate a bunch of crap (like cookie dough, and a couple little debbie snack cakes, and a regular coke.....) then I finished up with some healthy-ish stuff. I did end up eating pizza and coke today, Adam's two favorite foods. I think it is a little sick how I obsess about what I eat. It's such a girl thing to do. Such an American thing to do as well. Sigh. Refusing to think about it.

I am super nervous about going to the show tomorrow. I have to show by myself and I have a feeling I won't have hardly any support. I am also refusing to think about that. Yeay for coping and denial.

Note: Rereading this post I sound incredibly negative. I swear I am not that down, it's just late night syndrome, and I am alone in my house. I love reading everyone else's blogs right now. :P I figure you guys get sick of hearing me be sappy about my butthead. Some days being creative is way too much work, and I have to be simply not creative and regular. So bleh, that is the point of having a blog right? Not performing for other people. I still do. There is no where I can escape that, only Adam and my personal handwritten journal. I miss my butthead. I am sending my love to him, and to everyone who is missing THEIR butthead as well.

PS: HMC = Howl's Moving Castle