Ugh

I heard form Adam today! Yeay. He was really tired. I had a lot to tell him. He had a lot of stuff to look at, and he had to go too soon like always. Some days you just want to tear out your hair. Days and Days of thoughts about him and things you wanted to tell him condensed into a very tired half an hour. Its harder still because with im the conversation gets broken up and typos and and ugh. It's all ugh.

Who knows? Prolly another long time before I hear from him again. I have been playing so so much WoW, its a good escape, but the real world looms, and is going to eventually reclaim me. I know he is alive and ok, he says his bed is comfy and warm which is the best I can do for him and hope for him. I mean hell, it's kind of like having your hands tied behind your back. What the heck am I supposed to do for him now? And what can he do for me? I really is unfair for me to bring all of my worries and stresses to our very tight half an hour. It's not even like he can process them any way in the small amount of time we have. It's sort of like the fly in the window whacking itself in the head over and over. Tomorrow I am going to have to get out of bed and face the world. Ugh. Does not sound like fun. Well at least tomorrow is another day.

Usually I try to blog to a solution to what ever is ailing me and try and word my way through my thoughts as logically as possible. That is just not happening tonight, logic is just not the antidote today. Sigh. So if this entry does not seem to have its usual closyre (well at least it doesn't to me) that is why.